This isn't really infidelity-type news, and it is only tangentially a relationship issue; but D found out today that she will lose her job at the end of the month. Nobody denies she has been doing an excellent job, but she costs her employers a lot and she has some fundamental philosophical differences with them. In any event, she has been afraid for a while that this would happen, and now it has.
She has also been told that she can't let any of her colleagues know about it, or her employers will withhold her last paycheck. (sigh)
I talked with her on the phone and tried to reassure her. (Although I don't know how reassuring she found it for me to tell her that my last period of unemployment lasted way longer than I ever thought it would.) Intellectually she knows that this has nothing to do with her ability or performance, but emotionally it feels like a major failure to her. Nor is she really sure where to turn next. In the short run, she is likely to move back in with her husband, just to have a roof over her head.
By coincidence, she was going to be attending a prayer retreat in a couple of weeks; and she now thinks the timing looks almost (excuse the term) providential. Not that she has any idea what to pray, really, except to ask, "Where am I going now?"
Of course, it's not like it's just her. Stuff like this is happening all over. But that doesn't make it any easier. I did remind her that I love her, and she said that helped.
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I'm so sorry to hear that, I know it's very unsettling.
ReplyDeleteFar more marriages stay together for economic reasons than I ever realized. In the current economic conditions my own separate rent is unsustainable over the long term.
I didn't like hearing about "withhold the last paycheck", but I assume it's a severance check which they are otherwise not obligated to pay. Also, on reflection, there is some kindness in their giving D a full month notice.
I've been there. And it is so easy to harbor self-doubt through the process. You did the right thing, said the right things. But, as I'm sure you know, it's a process only she can go through.
ReplyDeleteI wish her the best.