New Year's meditation and ritual

Last night -- New Year's Eve -- Debbie hosted a meditation and ritual over Zoom. Besides Debbie herself there were three members of her current Sangha in attendance, plus me. And much of the event was classic retreat practice in the Plum Village tradition (that is, the tradition taught by Thich Nhat Hanh). Debbie led us in a guided meditation, then we spent some minutes in walking meditation, and then we meditated silently. So far, so normal.

Then, after a short break, Debbie asked us to get some paper and write down things that we were grateful for in 2021. I found I had a few, of which perhaps the most unexpected was that I was grateful for having been laid off work in the spring, under circumstances where I didn't have to be afraid about where my next meal is coming from. I was also grateful for my friends and family, of course -- in particular for Debbie and Marie, though I didn't think it was exactly the right time to say so that explicitly. Anyway, we all shared our gratitudes.

Then Debbie added that Buddhism is about achieving freedom, and in particular about the freedom that comes when we let go of things we have been clinging to. So she asked us to think of things that we were willing to let go of as we moved into the coming year. We were to write them down on slips of paper ... and then burn them. 

I didn't share my whole list. But there were four things I put on it, that I would be willing to let go of:

• Distraction: this means compulsively browsing the Internet, and it also means drinking too much.
  
• Delay and indecision over what to do with myself. (See also this post earlier today.)
• Related to that, fear that I absolutely have to get a job.
• And finally, after my discussions over Christmas with Son 2, bad or unhelpful trigger-reactions to Wife. 

I don't really know how to let go of these things. But I suppose intention matters. Sometimes ritual can help make things happen, as well. I guess we'll see.