The unbearable weight of being Stagg R. Leigh

I guess I'm I glad I'll never hit the big time.

A couple nights ago, I went out to see "American Fiction." Incidentally, it's a great movie, and one that works on many levels. If you haven't seen it yet, go see it now.

But in particular, I was emailing with Marie earlier this evening. I mentioned the movie and told her I'd liked it. She went online and found a trailer, and said it looks like "The Producers." I replied that it is nothing at all like "The Producers." (Not to say anything against "The Producers"! It's the funniest movie ever made. But "American Fiction" breathes a whole different air.)

So I started to think to myself, What do I like about it so much?

Fair warning: In what follows there are likely to be SPOILERS! So don't read any farther unless you have already seen the movie or just don't care.

Freedom is overrated

Freedom is overrated.

I guess I've talked about this before, not always in those words. I find only two places where I have said literally this: here in 2010, and here in 2023. But my post here, arguing that freedom is failure, comes pretty close to saying the same thing.

I first figured it out by watching Father. Back when he owned our family business he had a terrible time of it: I talk about that some here and here, and probably in other places too. At the time, I thought he was being imprisoned by the business; and it was plainly killing him. When he finally sold it, I thought, Now at last he'll be able to do all those things he has wanted to do for so long!

But he didn't. He'd start one project, and then he'd start another, and then he'd email crazy conspiracy theories with his old Army buddies, and then he'd stay up to watch the Late Show, and then … on and on and on. [I have no idea how far he got on any of these projects, but Mother would like me to find out.] But he never got anything actually Done, because he didn't Have To. He was free—as free as anyone I've ever known.

It didn't make him happy. Not having to go out and see people on a regular basis just made him sour and solitary. (He died in 2015, but compare also this post, just for example.)

I worried that could happen to me when my job ended, if I didn't get a regular full-time job to replace it. And, … well, you know, … it's hard to say I was wrong. Just in the last year I talk about that here (after coming home from Scotland) and here (after coming home from France and then Thanksgiving).

Ironically, there's even an argument that this is true of political freedom as well. A few days ago, I posted this over on the Patio, explaining the argument that the best regimes in the world are places like Niger, Uganda, and Angola—none of them "free countries" by any normal metric. 

It's funny. We feel a natural irritation when someone tells us what to do. Who do they think they are? I'll decide what I want to do! But when we have that freedom—well, for some of us, at any rate, it doesn't make us happy. I bet that's true for many of us. It's probably true of me, not that I'm about to surrender my freedom. It's easier to surrender my happiness.

Freedom is overrated.   

          

Did I need to hear this?

It's late at night. I've been drinking too much. I should be in bed. So I clicked on a recent clip on YouTube from Bill Maher.

And this is me. It's totally me. So is this going to kill me? Do I need to worry about it? Was this just some random video, or do I need to take it seriously?

Inquiring minds want to know ….

                

Willing and wanting

Willpower is a funny thing. Ten years ago I wrote about how true self-discipline is not "violent self-mastery through an iron will," but rather a form of "informed, intelligent self-manipulation" that "understand[s] yourself well enough to know what you have to do to set up conditions so that you will naturally act in the way you need to act." I still think that's not far wrong.

When did you start ...? (A follow-up post)

Just about ten years ago, I posted a rumination about what age people lose their virginity, and what age they start regularly fucking. Among other things, I posed the question whether these things travel in families? If your parents lost their virginity early (or late), did you do the same? How about your kids?

Of course it's political!

Just saw this post on LinkedIn. Someone argues that gender fluidity is spreading across the globe and then cautions, "This is not a political matter."

Of course it's a political matter. If it's not being caused by politics, then what's causing it? Biology? Doesn't change that fast. Social attitudes, values, cultural preferences? Those are all just part of politics writ large.

She links to this video, where she talks about the rate at which these changes are taking place. Nothing else besides politics moves that fast.

          

Gender role test

Meanwhile, I found a "gender role test" online, courtesy of some outfit called IDR Labs. Guess how I scored? 

(Right away I remembered having once written this post here.)

Or maybe all these generalizations are just a little silly.