Borderline

You remember last week, when Wife called the police because I wouldn't let her drag the boys into one of our arguments? Well I sent a copy of the story to D, to the Consultant, and to my father and brother. My father replied by telling me about some of the phenomenally unpleasant things Wife had done during the Shakespeare Festival (before Son 1 and I got there): chronic complaining, mostly, with bouts of shouting at him for no discernable reason.

But then a few days later he wrote me about a friend of his from his Rotary Club, who is a clinical psychologist. Apparently he made an appointment with this fellow and showed him my account of the visit from the police, supplementing it with some of his own descriptions of what she is like to be around. With all this as input, my dad's friend diagnosed Wife with Borderline Personality Disorder.

I thought that was kind of interesting ... one of her psychiatrists diagnosed her with the very same thing years and years ago, although I have no idea if he ever treated her for it. (To hear her tell it, all her psychiatric treatment over the years has been for depression; the fact that she has been put on medication for bipolar patients, and even on anti-psychotics, she chalks up to her depression being "treatment-resistant.") My dad naturally wondered if you can lock people away for a diagnosis like this, and found out the answer is No.

On the other hand, my question is whether this is enough to deny her custody. At this point I have gone back to drafting a Parenting Plan; my earlier idea of waiting till Son 2 is in boarding school has proven foolish. Of course it is likely that everybody except me realized this fact a year ago ....