"If to the soul, then what part does the body play in it?"
It's both.
"Is carnal love really the goal of it?"
Yes. Maybe not the only goal, but it is one among others. For example, when a student feels lust for a professor, the student's mind may genuinely want instruction; the student's soul probably wants to become like the professor in some way that the student admires. But it would be fatuous to say that the student's body is somehow not longing for a carnal consummation at the same time. At least, thinking back to when I was a student .... :-)
"If carnal love is the goal, is erotic love just a bodily appetite like hunger or thirst?"
Since the distinction between body and soul doesn't hold up in this context, erotic love is indeed a bodily appetite but there is no "just" about it; it is at the same time both an appetite of the body and a high aspiration of the soul.
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