MEMO dated October 16, 2012: I started this post and never finished it. In the ensuing four years it has sat in "Draft" status because I haven't really been willing to delete it. Don't know why not. Anyway, if I'm not going to delete it I may as well post it as a partial diary entry. I have no idea, needless to add, what I was going to say in the rest of it.
So let's see ... where was I?
Saturday we went to a wedding of an old friend. Wife uttered not a single word regarding our discussion the night before. Or well, ... OK maybe one or two words. That morning, when she was groggily crawling into consciousness, I asked her if she remembered our conversation; she said "Yes, I remember it; but that doesn't mean I want to discuss it in a lot of detail." I figured that was pretty clear, and I left the topic alone for the rest of the day. She, for her part, was either commenting on the wedding, or on the bad fashion sense of the other guests, or on how she had a headache and felt nauseated ... or else she was drifting off to sleep. Absolutely zero discussion of anything substantive between us -- even during the 90 minute drive to or from the wedding. Admittedly we had the kids along; and on the way back, she was asleep. Come to think of it, she pretty much fell asleep once we were home, too. I don't think she ate any dinner at all. Certainly we didn't talk.
Sunday was Father's Day. We spent the morning in bed talking -- nothing juicier than that (like fucking) I am sorry to say. I wish I could remember more of what we said. In the afternoon I took the boys out, while Wife (who was sidelined with a headache) spent a few hours exchanging IM's with Boyfriend 5. One thing I do remember mentioning to Wife was that she should start a blog to record her thoughts each day, and that it would be best if she didn't tell me the URL; that way, she would be free to write whatever she felt like. And I think that it is important for her to learn to be honest with herself, about herself. If it helps get her there to have a place where she can write anything without fear of discovery, so be it.
In the process of discussing blogs, I mentioned that I had recently done a search on blogspot.com and had found a whole subculture of blogs related to infidelity. Not that I thought a blog of hers would necessarily be an infidelity blog -- she has lots of other interests -- but just as an example of what people have going out there.
My mistake. Turns out that Wife didn't understand I was simply pointing to an example. ....
And the rest is lost to history.
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