The last thing I need, 2

It's interesting, the stories I tell myself if I listen.  Only a couple of months ago I was moping over having lost Debbie ... really moping, making myself very sad.  But now, when I stop to listen to the phrases and fantasies that drift through my head, the gist is much more in the vein of, "The last thing I need is a romance in my life."

It's odd, ... both the shift and how quick it is.  I've played this song for myself before -- notably here, but also (more recently) here and here.  Probably other places too.  (I never promised not to repeat myself in this blog.) 

So what's the deal?  Is it just sour grapes?  (Of course that's very likely.)  That is to say, do I reconcile myself to losing Debbie by telling myself, "Well thank God I don't have to deal with planning around another person all the time! No way I want to do that again!"?  Or is there more to it than that?

My guess is that it's several things at once.  Yes, no doubt sour grapes has something to do with it.  But also I think the points that I raised in some of my posts referenced above are valid too.  There is indeed something restful about not being in a romantic relationship.  And these days I'm finding myself busy enough that I can't really imagine when I would squeeze in time to devote to somebody else ... at any rate, if I still wanted to get any sleep.  So maybe it's "over-determined."

I don't suppose any of this is news, really.  I've talked about it before.  No stunning new insights.  It's just that I've overheard myself telling myself this kind of story kind of frequently lately, so I thought I'd make a record of it while I remembered.  Who knows, by next month I'll probably be telling myself some totally different story.  It's always something ....